Connected

There are so many ways to feel like you are a part of something. In much of what humans do is all in the quest to be and feel like you aren't the island you thought you were. You can be tapped into a various amount of things that have a spread spectrum networking to each aspect of life and still quest for the pieces that are just beyond your reach. There are the majors like sex in the way that passion elevates it to more than that or love, family, friends and for those that are spiritual (religious) a church. The search for the missing pieces is intense, unyielding and for some with less paths than others its a life quest of self.

The human psyche is seen to encompass three main parts; the soul, self and the mind. To me this means that the quest for networking and searching and finding these pieces is so that we can find ourselves. Being human we complete the blanks through comparison. We cannot help ourselves but to compare against others to measure ourselves so that we know where we stand. Its like lining up by height and figuring out who to stand next to in grade school. The only way to know where you stand is to watch as the line forms. Finding that place is satisfying because now you know where to stand and why and therefore gives you some insight into who you are and that meant one less piece to find.

We don't admit it but so much of who we are is given to us by each other. I don't mean it in a way that we are being cloned more like we are being formed by them like clay on its way to being a bowl. Our experiences and contrasting them with what we see in others helps to explain our inner selves. We are still individuals with separate senses of self and mind. What if our souls are part of a collective energy? It would stand to reason that physical separation would only leave longing. We do the silly, the amazing, the challenging and the defying to complete the triskill that is the human psyche. If our original state was a collective wouldn't it make sense to reconnect? These connections become the quest. The quest to marry, to have kids, to form/reconciliate a family, to find a church, belong to a group, a philosophy, or some other collective to feel and know that we are part of something bigger than ourselves and complete 3 part psyche.

I have done more than a poor job of this...one could say I have not only given up but have failed my quest. The downside of the quest to connect is the failure to find like minded individuals. In connecting with others you are ultimately looking for acceptance. Those groups of people that make you feel like you are 'normal.' The world is more vivid in color when viewing it with those who see it they way you do. If you are always questioned and ridiculed for your view then you are less likely to share. Not sharing can keep others as well as yourself from full self-actualization. Loss of self-actualization is death to one's soul. Its a death that while silent is still impactful to the collective from which it came.

The value of variety is measured everywhere and in everything we do. We understand most acutely is that if were all the same that groupthink would keep us from moving forward lacking the benefit of invention or ingenuity. While necessity would keep us on the slow ride forward variety is still the ingredient that keeps us at the top of the food chain. What isn't measured as often nor valued as much is the ability to connect. The connections we make maintains our humanity, feeds our sense of self, quiets the mind, and nourishes the soul to completeness. In the end all we really want to be is connected.

With the passing of yet another birthday, I am reminded that I have given up this quest and what that might mean to my development and sense of inner peace. I am faced with deciding to either change or risk atrophy.